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The 'Straight-Face' Thesis
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02/15/08 01:30 PM ET
Sometimes I think the key to survival in Washington is to be able to keep a straight face.
Case in point: Last week I'm having an evening glass of lemonade (this is my first post, so I'm not sure you get full disclosure until we get to know each other better) and over to the alleged bar-like structure comes Sen. Johnny Isakson (R-Ga.) to order ... er ... a few of his own glasses of lemonade.
Looking to make some small talk while his drinks were being prepared, I said, "Senator, I understand you guys just voted to increase the economic stimulus package."
And this is where my "straight-face" thesis kicks in.
Isakson, without missing a beat, grabbing his drinks in one fell swoop — and, most importantly, keeping a straight face, says: "Oh, no. We didn't increase anything — we just 'fixed' a few things." Beautiful. Whether that is a natural God-given gift, or a learned skill, you gotta love that.
That's the same kinda "skill" that allowed former House Oversight Chairman Dan Burton (R-Ind.) to blast Henry Waxman's (D-Calif.) "Roger Clemens hearing" Wednesday by expressing his shock and outrage at the "circus-like" atmosphere of the proceedings.
If you don't immediately see the humor in that statement, I refer you to Burton's own hearings focusing on just about every aspect of the Clinton administration.
To narrow that down for you, Burton's investigations began in approximately January 1995 and didn't end until — well, they've never really ended, since dozens of Burton's former staffers still wake up every morning somewhere, doing all they can (sometimes getting paid handsomely) to make sure that Hillary Clinton has less than a pleasant day.
Talking about the Clemens hearing, after all the pitches were thrown, and all the dust settled, the room was transformed into a party venue for the going-away bash for long-time Rep. Tom Davis (R-Va.) staffer David Marin.
Marin, well-liked, professional, and quite the K Street catch, is joining the folks over at the Podesta Group.
Davis talked about how he first met Marin when he was a reporter for a local Virginia newspaper that never seemed to give Davis a break. Davis joked that he hired Marin just so he could get him off the anti-Davis beat.
Upon seeing Davis about to present a small gift box to Marin, I mumbled, "It's Roger's leftover HGH." Got a small laugh from those around me. I would have shouted it louder for all to enjoy, but I obviously didn't have enough lemonade in me.
Jim Mills can be reached at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .
Case in point: Last week I'm having an evening glass of lemonade (this is my first post, so I'm not sure you get full disclosure until we get to know each other better) and over to the alleged bar-like structure comes Sen. Johnny Isakson (R-Ga.) to order ... er ... a few of his own glasses of lemonade.
Looking to make some small talk while his drinks were being prepared, I said, "Senator, I understand you guys just voted to increase the economic stimulus package."
And this is where my "straight-face" thesis kicks in.
Isakson, without missing a beat, grabbing his drinks in one fell swoop — and, most importantly, keeping a straight face, says: "Oh, no. We didn't increase anything — we just 'fixed' a few things." Beautiful. Whether that is a natural God-given gift, or a learned skill, you gotta love that.
That's the same kinda "skill" that allowed former House Oversight Chairman Dan Burton (R-Ind.) to blast Henry Waxman's (D-Calif.) "Roger Clemens hearing" Wednesday by expressing his shock and outrage at the "circus-like" atmosphere of the proceedings.
If you don't immediately see the humor in that statement, I refer you to Burton's own hearings focusing on just about every aspect of the Clinton administration.
To narrow that down for you, Burton's investigations began in approximately January 1995 and didn't end until — well, they've never really ended, since dozens of Burton's former staffers still wake up every morning somewhere, doing all they can (sometimes getting paid handsomely) to make sure that Hillary Clinton has less than a pleasant day.
Talking about the Clemens hearing, after all the pitches were thrown, and all the dust settled, the room was transformed into a party venue for the going-away bash for long-time Rep. Tom Davis (R-Va.) staffer David Marin.
Marin, well-liked, professional, and quite the K Street catch, is joining the folks over at the Podesta Group.
Davis talked about how he first met Marin when he was a reporter for a local Virginia newspaper that never seemed to give Davis a break. Davis joked that he hired Marin just so he could get him off the anti-Davis beat.
Upon seeing Davis about to present a small gift box to Marin, I mumbled, "It's Roger's leftover HGH." Got a small laugh from those around me. I would have shouted it louder for all to enjoy, but I obviously didn't have enough lemonade in me.
Jim Mills can be reached at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .
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