Nudists to lobby on Capitol Hill

The good news: You may see nudists next week on Capitol Hill.

The bad news: They will be wearing clothes.

“We want lawmakers to know that members of the American Association for Nude Recreation (AANR) enjoy their pastime within appropriate settings,” says Executive Director Erich Schuttauf.

Translation: The nudists won’t be naked.

The AANR will be visiting a handful of congressional offices, but it is keeping the names of the lawmakers close to the chest (pun intended).

AANR members hope to increase the number of locations for enjoying nude recreation on public lands. And like a good lobbying association, AANR is armed with hard data. The group states, “Several polls taken of the traveling public indicate that nearly 20 percent of all persons in North America enjoy skinny-dipping and nude sunbathing.”

AANR spokeswoman Carolyn Hawkins said her group will also be meeting with federal agencies next week.

At one point during the interview with the AANR, ITK was put on hold. But fortunately, with the nudist group, there is no insufferable telephone music. Instead, ITK got details about skinny-dipping clubs and activities for Nude Recreation Week.

Chicken in a biscuit, with a cigarette butt

House staffers who eat at the Longworth cafeteria might want to start peeking in between their sandwich buns before taking their first bite.

One staffer had quite the surprise Wednesday morning when she headed to the cafeteria to pick up a quick breakfast. According to an ITK spy, the staffer spotted a lone chicken biscuit under the heat lamps and grabbed it. She opened the wrapper and the biscuit to spread jelly on the sandwich, but she also found a cigarette butt touching the bread.

The staffer complained to cafeteria managers, who offered to give her another food item for free. She declined, citing a loss of appetite.

Restaurant Associates Regional Director Mary Bowman said the cafeteria managers are taking the matter “very seriously.”

“We’re still looking into it with the people responsible,” she added.

Meanwhile, ITK advises cafeteria diners to scour their potential food purchases for stray trash stuffed alongside their meat.

Ney gets used to life without media mobs

Former Rep. Bob Ney (R-Ohio) misses the media. Well, kind of.

The ex-lawmaker, who served 17 months in prison for his role in the Jack Abramoff scandal, told the Independent Film Channel (IFC) that he had to adjust to life out of the spotlight.

During his courthouse appearances, Ney was mobbed by the media — so much so that his lawyer once cut his hand while trying to shut the car door.

But when he got out of jail last year, Ney said, the crowds had gone.

In the IFC interview, which aired this week, Ney said, “I walked out of that prison, went up to the bus station, looked around — [there was] no one. I got on the bus and it stopped in Columbus, Ohio. I got off the bus, looked around — no one. I got a cab to the halfway house; I made [the cab driver] circle the halfway house twice. No one.

“I was in shock. I was a nobody. And then in a weird, weird way, it was kind of a letdown.”

Ney, who attended the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner last month, is now a radio talk show host who isn’t as right-leaning as he used to be.

He gives high marks to the Obama administration and is critical of former President George W. Bush, specifically on the Iraq war.

“I lied and no one died,” Ney said. “He lied and people died.”

Ney, however, doesn’t regret changing the name of french fries in the House cafeteria to “freedom fries.”

“I’d do it again,” he said.

Anything you can do …

President Obama is not the only high-ranking White House official to bear his chest for everyone to see.

Like Obama earlier this year, Vice President Biden was recently photographed showing off his pecs.

TMZ has posted photos of Biden and his wife, Jill, soaking in the rays on a New Jersey beach last weekend.

Snarky TMZ TV staffers gave Biden’s physique mixed reviews, with one noting that Obama’s goods are much better than the vice president’s. But TMZ Managing Editor Harvey Levin noted that Biden is much older than Obama.

ITK gives a thumbs-up for Biden and can only hope to look like that when we turn 66.

Pay to party on Neugebauer’s boat

The Federal Election Commission has taken a little bit of the party out of Rep. Randy NeugebauerRobert (Randy) Randolph NeugebauerCordray announces he's leaving consumer bureau, promotes aide to deputy director GOP eager for Trump shake-up at consumer bureau Lobbying World MORE’s (R-Texas) party boat.

The fun police at the FEC have turned down Neugebauer’s request to let him treat the boat as his for fundraising events. That means he’ll have to pay the company that owns it, of which he is a partner, for any of the events. At least, that’s what the FEC staff recommended to the commission this week.

Neugebauer and family members formed a Texas-based company last year to buy the boat, which is to be harbored in the Washington area. Neugebauer and his wife own 60 percent of the boat.

Through election law über-attorney Benjamin Ginsberg, the lawmaker asked the FEC to allow him to use the boat for free as long as his use stayed within his percentage of the ownership. But if the full commission agrees with the staff’s recommendation, he’d have to treat it as an in-kind donation or pay fair-market rates to the company that owns it.

Inhofe still flying high after 10,000 hours

The Hill recently wrote about Rep. Sam GravesSamuel (Sam) Bruce GravesFive obstacles to Trump's infrastructure ambitions White House still eyeing gas tax hike to pay for infrastructure plan The Hill Interview: Missouri Republican has gavel on his radar MORE’s (R-Mo.) 1,600 hours of flying time, but there’s a pilot in Congress’s upper chamber who trumps him — by a mere 8,400 hours.

Sen. James InhofeJames (Jim) Mountain InhofeEPA's Pruitt: Bring back 'true environmentalism' Tax cut complete, hawks push for military increase Trump meets with oil-state GOP senators on ethanol mandate MORE (R-Okla.) reached his 10,000th flying hour May 26 on his return trip from an Oklahoma staff retreat. It’s yet another feather in the cap of this seasoned pilot, who has been licensed to fly for 51 years.

“I was coming back with my staff with me in one of my planes during recess, and I was bringing my log book up to date, and I said, ‘My gosh, I just passed 10,000 hours,’ ” the senator told ITK.

Inhofe offered the following highs and lows of his flying career: a 16-day around-the-world trip in 1991 that he called “miserable” (especially over Siberia, where he was detained because Russian officials didn’t think he had permission to fly, and where — perhaps worse — he was forced to eat “the same slop” for breakfast, lunch and dinner); a 1981 flight through a hurricane to deliver aid to the small Caribbean island nation of Dominica; and a 1999 mishap in which a propeller fell off his plane mid-flight.

Inhofe’s initial pilot license, which he remembers costing $32, might have been the best investment he’s ever made. He regularly flies around Oklahoma for work, flew charter flights to Central America and Mexico, and even used his airplane hangar for two of his daughters’ wedding receptions.

The 74-year-old senator also said he beats back those who think he’s too old to run for office by reminding them that he still flies airplanes upside down.