The Hill's 12:30 Report

The Hill's 12:30 Report

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--> A midday take on what's happening in politics and how to have a sense of humor about it.*

*Ha. Haha. Hahah. Sniff. Haha. Sniff. Ha-- breaks down crying hysterically.

  

The Hill's 12:30 Report: Trump at UN calls Kim 'rocket man' on 'suicide mission' | Threatens to 'totally destroy' North Korea if it harms allies | Spicer regrets crowd size briefing | Trump lawyer's Senate interview postponed | ObamaCare repeal bill gains momentum | A cringe-worthy campaign ad | Clinton on 'The Late Show' tonight

SOMEDAY, I WANT THIS TO BE HELD AT EPCOT. THAT'S ALL: This morning, President Trump laid out his "America First" vision of foreign affairs at the United Nations. The Hill's live blog of updates: http://bit.ly/2xbitm1

First let's set the scene for you:

The song you need to let play in the background while reading this --> http://bit.ly/2xbSPxb

9:56 a.m: EDT: President Trump arrived at the United Nations Photo: http://bit.ly/2ybeoL9

Video of Trump arriving and briefly speaking: http://bit.ly/2xjhBe1

Lol, I LOVE old Trump tweets: From Oct. 2012: "The cheap 12 inch sq. marble tiles behind speaker at UN always bothered me. I will replace with beautiful large marble slabs if they ask me." http://bit.ly/2wDSgrC

^^I mean, he has a point. Photo of Trump's backdrop: http://bit.ly/2hf4Gkm

Photo of the room and attendees: http://bit.ly/2xbq43L

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The speech itself:

The gist of the speech: "Two speeches: First half is harmony, sovereignty, not imposing American will. Second half is NK, Iran, Syria, taking out oppressive regimes." http://bit.ly/2xjt7pY

Trump on N. Korea -- rocket maaaaaaan: "Rocket man is on a suicide mission for himself and his regime," Trump said. He added: "The United States has great strength and patience, but if it is forced to defend itself or its allies, we will have no choice but to totally destroy North Korea." http://bit.ly/2xe2fWz Watch: http://bit.ly/2w4FK5j

Trump on Iran: "The Iran deal was one of the worst and most one-sided transactions the United States has ever entered into," Trump said. "Frankly, that deal is an embarrassment to the United States and I don't think you have heard the last of it, believe me." http://bit.ly/2hcGUsG

This is important: "'Rocket Man' quote will get the headlines but the Iran stuff here is more startling on substance." http://bit.ly/2xb4QmE

A happy camper: "Noted: [Israeli Prime Minister Benyamin Netanyahu] nodding with approval at Trump's Iran bashing" (From Politico's Susan Glasser) http://bit.ly/2wtUwXq

Interesting context: "This whole Trump speech is very...Breitbartian." (From The Hill's Niall Stanage) http://bit.ly/2jJeTtV

Yes, Trump said this: "Loser terrorists."

I.e. -- America's horoscope sign is "Libra": America "can no longer be taken advantage of or enter into a one-sided deal where the United States gets nothing in return." http://bit.ly/2xez0CY

It's Tuesday -- Happy "Talk like a Pirate" Day! I'm Cate Martel with a quick recap of the morning and what's coming up. Send comments, story ideas and events for our radar to cmartel@thehill.com, @CateMartel and on Facebook.

Y'KNOW -- A QUIET, PEACEFUL TUESDAY MORNING: Via The Hill's Katie Bo Williams, President Trump's personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, denied any involvement with Russian attempts to meddle in the 2016 presidential election. Why we're talking about this: He was scheduled to meet with Senate Intelligence Committee staff in a closed-door interview this morning. He released a public statement beforehand. What to know about Cohen: Cohen is a fiercely loyal aide known from his days as an executive at the Trump Organization as the president's "pit bull." He is seen as a key figure in the myriad investigations into election meddling. http://bit.ly/2hcGUsG

Ehhhh, or not: The Senate Intelligence Committee abruptly canceled Cohen's interview. http://cnn.it/2xjl7oL

JUST NOW -- The reason: Senate Intelligence Committee Chairman Richard Burr (R-NC) and Vice Chairman Mark WarnerMark Robert WarnerRussians' indictment casts shadow ahead of Trump-Putin summit Top Senate Dem: Trump administration's lack of focus on election security an 'embarrassment' Dem senator: We need other Americans in the room with Trump, Putin MORE (D-VA) released a statement: "We were disappointed that Mr. Cohen decided to pre-empt today's interview by releasing a public statement prior to his engagement with Committee staff, in spite of the Committee's requests that he refrain from public comment. As a result, we declined to move forward with today's interview and will reschedule..." http://bit.ly/2fyrLyo

Photo of Cohen arriving this morning: http://bit.ly/2xjt7q4

THE MOST SATISFYING THING I'VE READ ALL WEEK -- WHEN IN DOUBT, SPICE IT UP: Via The New York Times's Glenn Thrush and Dave Itzkoff, former White House press secretary Sean Spicer says he regrets his decision to hold a press conference to berate reporters for inauguration crowd sizes. "Of course I do, absolutely," Spicer said in the Monday interview. http://nyti.ms/2wu1hbR

HOW THE OBAMACARE REPEAL IS GOING AGAIN -- BETTER THAN LAST TIME!: A last-ditch effort by Senate Republicans to repeal and replace ObamaCare is gaining steam, suggesting lawmakers could face another vote on ending the former president's signature law later this month. Does it have 51 votes?: No, but pressure is growing on Republicans to back the measure, which could replace much of ObamaCare with block grants for states. http://bit.ly/2he91nV

JUST POSTED -- Where each Republican senator stands: The Hill has assembled a whip list of each Republican senator on the last-ditch effort to repeal and replace ObamaCare. No: 1; Undecided: 6; Likely yes: 3; Yes: 9. http://bit.ly/2wuFjFF

BEHIND THE SCENES -- HOW GREAT WOULD IT HAVE BEEN FOR THIS TO BE AN ALASKA, SARAH PALIN-THEMED LUNCH?: Via CNN's Manu Raju, in public, President Trump berated Sen. Lisa MurkowskiLisa Ann MurkowskiDem infighting erupts over Supreme Court pick McConnell: Senate to confirm Kavanaugh by Oct. 1 Overnight Energy: House to vote on anti-carbon tax measure | Dem says EPA obstructed 'politically charged' FOIA requests | GOP looks to overhaul endangered species law MORE (R-Alaska) for her stance on the ObamaCare repeal, but behind the scenes, the president invited her over for a private lunch to make nice. Murkowski had to decline because of an obligation in her home state, but appreciated the gesture. http://cnn.it/2hdV5hc

INTERESTING READ: From The Hill's Jessie Hellman, in the clubby world of the Senate, lawmakers' relationships could decide the fate of the ObamaCare repeal. How it could play out: http://bit.ly/2f7hske

PAUL MANAFORT'S UGLY DIVORCE BATTLE WITH THE U.S. GOVERNMENT: Via CNN's Evan Perez, Shimon Prokupecz and Pamela Brown, the government wiretapped President Trump's former campaign chairman Paul Manafort during (!) and after the 2016 presidential election. Why: Some communications made the government wonder if Manafort was encouraging the Russians to help Trump win. How did they legally wiretap him?: A secret order from the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act court. http://cnn.it/2hdciaB

LATEST HURRICANE FORECASTS: Hurricane Maria, a Category 5, is headed towards the U.S. Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico. Hurricane Jose is much weaker, but is expected to cause minor flooding in the coastal areas of New England. Latest paths: http://wapo.st/2heVWKO

IN IMPORTANT TOY NEWS -- TOYS R US FILES FOR CHAPTER 11: Via CNBC's Lauren Hirsch, "Toys R Us has filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy protection ... the bankruptcy filing helps the Wayne New Jersey-based toy retailer relieve itself of the debt left over from its $6.6 billion acquisition ... in a 2005 deal." Statement from their CEO: "Today marks the dawn of a new era at Toys"R"Us where we expect that the financial constraints that have held us back will be addressed in a lasting and effective way ... We are confident that these are the right steps to ensure that the iconic Toys"R"Us and Babies"R"Us brands live on for many generations." http://cnb.cx/2f7w82B

 

NOTABLE TWEETS:

Mic's Emily C. Singer (Oh myyyyyy)
I've seen a lot of campaign ads. A lot. This might be the worst I've ever seen. Watch: http://bit.ly/2xdYhNI

Matthew Scarborough (Hahaha)
Meanwhile, at the Classics Faculty... Photo: http://bit.ly/2fg1LL4

 

ON TAP:

The Senate is in. The House is out until next week.

This morning: President Trump gave an address to the 72nd session of the United Nations General Assembly.

12:15 p.m. EDT: The Senate votes on the nomination of Noel Francisco to be solicitor general of the United States. Their schedule today: http://bit.ly/2xdSpnB

12:30 p.m. EDT: The Senate breaks for weekly caucus luncheons.

1 p.m. EDT: President Trump meets with the secretary general of the United Nations and attends a luncheon.

1 p.m. EDT: According to CNET, iOS 11 will be released this afternoon if Apple follows its usual schedule. What to know about the new operating system: http://cnet.co/2xPnUaI

4 p.m. EDT: President Trump meets with the emir of Qatar.

8 p.m. EDT: President Trump gives remarks at a diplomatic reception he is hosting with the first lady.

 

WHAT TO WATCH:

Tonight: Hillary ClintonHillary Diane Rodham ClintonHillary Clinton to Trump ahead of Putin summit: 'Do you know which team you play for?' 10 things we learned from Peter Strzok's congressional testimony Get ready for summit with no agenda and calculated risks MORE will appear on "The Late Show," her first late-night television appearance since losing the presidential election. http://bit.ly/2wOVf2e

 

NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF...:

Today is National Butterscotch Pudding Day.

SAY IT AIN'T SO!: Via Thrillist, the United States is facing a chicken wing shortage. What this means: Expect restaurants to push boneless wings and offer less wing deals for sporting events. http://bit.ly/2fh9Nn9

I *CLAP* LOVE *CLAP* THEMED *CLAP* BARS: Via Washingtonian's Jessica Sidman, the "Game of Thrones" pop-up bar in Washington, D.C., will convert into a terrifying Halloween pop-up bar. The pictures look awesome: http://bit.ly/2yapb8E

I LOVE THIS STORY SO MUCH: A photo shows a bride standing with six women wearing the same navy dress. They're not her bridesmaids, just guests. They just all happened to wear the same dress. The photo is amazing: http://bit.ly/2fhcF3t

And to give you some motivation to get through Tuesday, here's the most determined hamster I've ever seen: http://bit.ly/2xu7TGd

 

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