White House cites satire column to tout budget

The White House included a satirical column in its list of news stories meant to promote Trump agenda — apparently ignoring the fact that the column actually savages Trump's new budget. 

Friday’s edition of the “1600 Daily” highlighted a Washington Post article by humorist Alexandra Petri with a deceptively positive title: “Trump’s budget makes perfect sense and will fix America, and I will tell you why.”

But Petri's column is actually a brutal attack on Trump's proposed budget, with cuts domestic programs and the State Department while boosting the defense budget.

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“Some people are complaining that the budget proffered by the Trump administration, despite its wonderful, macho-sounding name, is too vague and makes all sorts of cuts to needed programs in favor of increasing military spending by leaps and bounds,” she wrote Thursday. "These people are wimps.”

“America has been soft and weak for too long,” Petri added. "BUT HOW WILL I SURVIVE ON THIS BUDGET? you may be wondering. I AM A HUMAN CHILD, NOT A COSTLY FIGHTER JET. You may not survive, but that is because you are SOFT and WEAK, something this budget is designed to eliminate.”

Petri next pokes fun at various funding cuts actually suggested in Trump’s first federal budget blueprint, which was released Thursday.

“Affordable housing is a luxury and we are going to get rid of it,” she said. "Donald TrumpDonald John TrumpO’Malley tells Dems not to fear Trump Right way and wrong way Five things to know about the elephant trophies controversy MORE does not live in affordable housing and neither should you.”

“AMERICA WILL BE STRONGER THAN IT HAS EVER BEEN! Anyone who survives will be a gun covered in the fur of a rare mammal, capable of fighting disease with a single muscular flex.”

Trump’s budget blueprint features double-digit cuts to social and environmental programs, while also pitching a $54 billion increase in the defense budget. Trump budget chief Mick Mulvaney engaged in a contentious exchange with reporters Thursday, as he defended cuts to the Meals on Wheels program for seniors.

The proposal’s suggested cuts have already drawn bipartisan criticism for targeting programs that help the poor, cultural and social initiatives and scientific research on climate change.

Presidential budgets typically only a proposed guide for Congress, since lawmakers control funding.