The Hill's 12:30 Report

The Hill's 12:30 Report

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The Hill's 12:30 Report: How Bernie actually won | BoehnerJohn Andrew BoehnerIs Congress retrievable? Boehner reveals portrait done by George W. Bush Meadows to be replaced by Biggs as Freedom Caucus leader MORE unloads on Cruz | Jets wide receiver testifying today | Trump Cabinet talk | National Blueberry Pie Day | Starbucks "Frappy Hour"

THIS SOUNDS LIKE A SUBMISSION TO "TEXTS FROM MY EX": Former Speaker John BoehnerJohn Andrew BoehnerIs Congress retrievable? Boehner reveals portrait done by George W. Bush Meadows to be replaced by Biggs as Freedom Caucus leader MORE (R-Ohio) panned GOP presidential hopeful Ted CruzRafael (Ted) Edward CruzThe Hill's Morning Report - Dem debate contenders take aim at Warren The Hill's Morning Report - Trump grapples with Turkey controversy This week: Congress returns to chaotic Washington MORE as "Lucifer in the flesh" during comments at an event Wednesday night at Stanford University. "I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life." Oh, and he also called Cruz a jackass. See, guys? Politics can be fun. http://bit.ly/1T73vwD

CRUZ TAKES IT WITH LOVE: Ted Cruz mocked Boehner's criticism as an "endorsement," and said he could do without it. "Tell me again who will stand up to Washington?" Cruz asked in his own tweet. http://bit.ly/26xwl3k

AND BECAUSE THIS IS A FUN ONE TO CHIME IN ON: Speaker Paul RyanPaul Davis RyanAmash: Trump incorrect in claiming Congress didn't subpoena Obama officials Democrats hit Scalia over LGBTQ rights Three-way clash set to dominate Democratic debate MORE (R-Wis.) said Thursday he has a better relationship with Ted Cruz than Boehner. Funny anecdote: Ryan allowed reporters to bring their children to the press conference to commemorate Take Your Sons and Daughters to Work Day. As NBC's Luke Russert began to read Boehner's quote aloud, Ryan quickly interrupted: "There are children here, watch what you say next!" Lol. http://bit.ly/24mFVUJ

It's Thursday and Bring Your Kids to Work Day! I'm Cate Martel with a quick recap of what you missed this morning and what's on tap for the rest of the day. Send comments, story ideas and upcoming events to cmartel@thehill.com@CateMartel and on Facebook.

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BAHAHA! YOU THINK I ACTUALLY WANTED TO BE PRESIDENT!?: While the race for the Democratic presidential nomination is essentially over, The Hill's Niall Stanage argues Bernie SandersBernie SandersOvernight Health Care — Presented by National Taxpayers Union — House Dems change drug pricing bill to address progressive concerns | Top Republican rejects Dem proposal on surprise medical bills | Vaping group launches Fox News ad blitz Democrats have reason to worry after the last presidential debate Krystal Ball on Sanders debate performance: 'He absolutely hit it out of the park' MORE is winning. How: "Against all odds, Sanders has won 18 contests. He has inspired young and progressive voters. He has raised huge sums of money, without the help of a super-PAC. And he has forced his key issues of income inequality and campaign finance to the center of the race." http://bit.ly/1VWnVyJ

TRUMP CABINET PREDICTIONS: Based on interviews with Donald Trump supporters, The Hill's Scott Wong and Mike Lillis lay out predictions on whom a President TrumpDonald John TrumpGOP congressman slams Trump over report that U.S. bombed former anti-ISIS coalition headquarters US to restore 'targeted assistance' to Central American countries after migration deal Trump says lawmakers should censure Schiff MORE would tap for his Cabinet. Full reasoning here: http://bit.ly/21gVN9w  

OBAMA: I WILL NOT ENDORSE. I WILL NOT ENDORSE. BUT...: Via The Hill's Jordan Fabian, President Obama rebuked Bernie Sanders for his plan to break up the big banks, calling the idea unrealistic. "But one of the things that I've consistently tried to remind myself during the course of my presidency is that the economy is not an abstraction," he said. "It's not something that you can just redesign and break up and put back together again without consequences." http://bit.ly/24my4qc

INTERESTING READ -- UBER'S ARGUMENT AGAINST TIPPING: Via The Boston Globe's Dan Adams, Uber is facing criticism for refusing to add a tipping function to its app. The argument: Tipping is inherently unfair because of customers' unconscious racial biases. Rival Lyft has offered the tipping function from their start. Here's the back-and-forth argument: http://bit.ly/24mhZki

ANNOUNCED LAST NIGHT -- BILL REQUIRES WOMEN TO REGISTER FOR DRAFT: Women would have to register for the draft under an amendment added to an annual defense bill Wednesday. Why it's a "gotcha" moment: Rep. Duncan Hunter (Calif.), the GOP sponsor who proposed the amendment actually voted against it but intended to make a point about women serving on the front line. "By his own admission ... the California Republican does not actually intend to include women in a draft and voted down his own amendment." http://politi.co/1VUBlfe

FOR A MIDDAY BREAK: The Snapchat King of Congress, Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-Calif.) is taking over The Hill's Snapchat account. Follow @thehilldotcom to see a play by play of what Swalwell is up to today.

 

NOTABLE ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

Caitlyn Jenner posted a video on Instagram from the Trump Tower
Thanks Donald! http://bit.ly/1WrHIVU

Sen. Barbara BoxerBarbara Levy BoxerHillicon Valley: Ocasio-Cortez clashes with former Dem senator over gig worker bill | Software engineer indicted over Capital One breach | Lawmakers push Amazon to remove unsafe products Ocasio-Cortez blasts former Dem senator for helping Lyft fight gig worker bill Only four Dem senators have endorsed 2020 candidates MORE (D-Calif.) (Dannnng.)
I predict that the latest Carly Fiorina merger will be as successful as her last one. http://bit.ly/1UhV1rY

The Los Angeles Times's Mike Memoli (this was a surprise visit)
Vice President Joe BidenJoe BidenTrump says lawmakers should censure Schiff Schiff says committees will eventually make impeachment inquiry transcripts public Trump threat lacks teeth to block impeachment witnesses MORE has arrived in Iraq, touching down on the Spirit of Strom Thurmond as AF2 http://bit.ly/1rkybo9

 

ON TAP:

1 p.m. EDT: Donald Trump holds a rally in Evansville, Ind.

1:15-4:15 p.m. EDT: The House votes, including on a GOP measure disapproving new rules for financial advisers.

2 p.m. EDT: Jets wide receiver Brandon Marshall will testify before the Senate Finance Committee on mental health issues. Info: http://bit.ly/1N2OZK8 

2 p.m. EDT: Victims of Hurricane Sandy protest at FEMA. 

2 p.m. EDT: The Senate is expected to vote on a water and energy spending bill.

2 p.m. EDT: The House Homeland Security Committee is marking up the National Cybersecurity Preparedness Consortium Act of 2016.

2:30 p.m. EDT: Ted Cruz holds a rally in Fort Wayne, Ind.

3 p.m. EDT: Bernie Sanders holds a rally in Oregon's Eugene-Springfield area.

4:30 p.m. EDT: Ted Cruz holds a rally in South Bend, Ind.

5:30 p.m. EDT: John Kasich holds a town hall in Portland, Ore.

7 p.m. EDT: President Obama and first lady Michelle ObamaMichelle LeVaughn Robinson ObamaPoll shows Michelle Obama would lead in New Hampshire if she entered 2020 Democratic race Obamas' first Netflix project nominated for Critics' Choice Documentary Awards Maggie Rogers shares letter from 'huge fans' Barack and Michelle Obama MORE celebrate Passover with a Seder dinner.

9:30 p.m. EDT: John Kasich holds a town hall in Medford, Ore.

10 p.m. EDT: Donald Trump holds a rally in Costa Mesa, Calif.

 

NOW FOR THE FUN STUFF ...:

Today is National Blueberry Pie Day!

TALK ABOUT A THROWBACK THURSDAY: Via the "Today" show's Eun Kyung Kim, 50 years ago, four young Marines posed on a beach together before heading to Vietnam. Well, they just recreated the same photo. It's worth checking out: http://on.today.com/26wP8Mk 

FRAPPY HOUR: Starting today until May 2, Starbucks is offering a half-off Frappuccino happy hour from 3-6 p.m for members of its rewards program. The coffee giant has also added a Birthday Cake Frappuccino to the menu.

And because you made it this far, here's an epic battle of little dogs vs. big couches. http://bit.ly/1VE1RsX

 

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