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--> A midday take on what's happening in politics and how to have a sense of humor about it.*

*Ha. Haha. Hahah. Sniff. Haha. Sniff. Ha--breaks down crying hysterically.


The Hill's 12:30 Report: Trump threatens to veto omnibus over border wall, DACA | White House confident he will sign bill | Bolton replaces McMaster as national security adviser | What the shakeup means | Stormy Daniels's lawyer teases mystery disc | What to know for Saturday's anti-gun violence rallies | Royal wedding invites


Trump: 'Psyyyyyych!'




From 12:40 a.m. until 8:54 a.m. -- No shutdown here!


A little after midnight last night, the Senate approved the massive omnibus spending bill, sending it to President TrumpDonald John TrumpA better VA, with mental health services, is essential for America's veterans Pelosi, Nadler tangle on impeachment, contempt vote Trump arrives in Japan to kick off 4-day state visit MORE's desk. The vote: 65-32, well over the simple majority needed. Was this expected: Well, senators yesterday were bracing for a potentially long weekend because of objections from a few lawmakers.

As of 8:55 a.m. -- Wait, no. DONALD! I swear to--! If you even--" 

President Trump suggested he may veto the omnibus spending bill, which passed both chambers in Congress. This would mean: Lawmakers likely have the votes to override the veto, but there would be a government shutdown before they had time to vote. Was this expected?: No, Capitol Hill was blindsided by the announcement, with many lawmakers making plans to leave town and some attending the funeral for Rep. Louise SlaughterDorothy (Louise) Louise SlaughterSeven Republicans vote against naming post office after ex-Rep. Louise Slaughter Breaking through the boys club Sotomayor, Jane Fonda inducted into National Women's Hall of Fame MORE (D-N.Y.). Why the veto threat: Trump cited a lack of funding for his border wall and no fix for the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA) program.

He tweeted: "I am considering a VETO of the Omnibus Spending Bill based on the fact that the 800,000 plus DACA recipients have been totally abandoned by the Democrats (not even mentioned in Bill) and the BORDER WALL, which is desperately needed for our National Defense, is not fully funded."

REACTION -- A LITTLE REINFORCEMENT FROM SEN. CORKER: Shortly after, Sen. Bob CorkerRobert (Bob) Phillips CorkerJeff Daniels blasts 'cowardice' of Senate Republicans against Trump Corker: 'I just don't' see path to challenge Trump in 2020 Ex-GOP Sen. Corker: Trump primary would be 'good thing for our country' MORE (R-Tenn.) tweeted support. "Please do, Mr. President. I am just down the street and will bring you a pen. The spending levels without any offsets are grotesque, throwing all of our children under the bus. Totally irresponsible."

THE WHITE HOUSE GETS INVOLVED -- DON'T MIND HIM: White House officials are confident President Trump will sign the $1.3 trillion omnibus approved by Congress despite his surprise threat via Twitter to veto the bill. How we know: "I think we'll be OK," White House Director of Legislative Affairs Marc Short told CNN. And from an administration source: "I think he just wanted to add a little drama," the source told The Hill. "Everyone here is confident he'll sign it when it arrives at the White House."

Tidbit from yesterday afternoon -- Ohhhh, Sen. Paul. Don't expect too many holiday cards next year: 

T-G-I-F. I'm Cate Martel with a quick recap of the morning and what's coming up. Send comments, story ideas and events for our radar to, @CateMartel and on Facebook.



I'm sorry, everyone, but I can't unsee this:
John Bolton -->
His doppelganger -->

President Trump announced yesterday that he will replace national security adviser H.R. McMaster with former U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations John Bolton

Why: McMaster, a three-star Army lieutenant general, will retire from the military. The general has been discussing his departure with Trump for some time, and both men decided to make his exit official now because the constant speculation about his job status was interfering with his duties, according to the White House. 

What to know about John Bolton: The former U.N. ambassador is a foreign policy hawk. Some think "Bolton's bellicose approach will only encourage Trump's more aggressive foreign policy instincts." Five facts about Bolton:

When the change will happen: April 9. 

Nope, wasn't curious. But if I had to see this, then you have to see this ;)



Major teaser -- ummm, what is on that disc?:

Stormy Daniels's attorney hinted that he may have hard evidence that the adult-film actress had an affair with President Trump, posting a photo on Twitter of what appeared to be a compact disc in a safe. Daniels's lawyer tweeted, "If 'a picture is worth a thousand words,' how many words is this worth?????" Yikes

KEEP IN MIND FOR SUNDAY (!!): The '60 Minutes' interview with Stormy Daniels will air this Sunday at 7 p.m. EDT.



Spotted -- ain't no party like a bipartisan book party: 

Via The Hill's Judy Kurtz, Presidential pollster Mark Penn and PR maven Meredith Fineman celebrated the release of their book this week, "Microtrends Squared: The New Small Forces Driving Today's Big Disruptions."

Spotted at the Georgetown book party: Commerce Secretary Wilbur RossWilbur Louis RossChina state media accuses US of seeking to 'colonize global business' China accuses US of 'rumors' and 'lies' about Huawei government ties Weather forecasters predict up to 15 major storms this hurricane season MORE; White House counselor Kellyanne Conway; Sen. Joe ManchinJoseph (Joe) ManchinSenate Democrats to House: Tamp down the impeachment talk The Hill's Morning Report - Trump says no legislation until Dems end probes Senate panel approves Interior nominee over objections from Democrats MORE (D-W.Va.); GOP Reps. Charlie DentCharles (Charlie) Wieder DentCNN celebrates correspondents' weekend with New Orleans-themed brunch The Hill's Morning Report - Government is funded, but for how long? Ex-GOP lawmaker says his party is having a 'Monty Python' moment on shutdown MORE (Pa.) and Leonard Lance (N.J.); The Hill's editor-in-chief, Bob Cusack; Rep. Josh GottheimerJoshua (Josh) GottheimerHillicon Valley: Facebook won't remove doctored Pelosi video | Trump denies knowledge of fake Pelosi videos | Controversy over new Assange charges | House Democrats seek bipartisan group on net neutrality House Democrats seek bipartisan working group on net neutrality Republicans attempt to amend retirement savings bill to include anti-BDS language MORE (D-N.J.); former Sen. Evan Bayh (D-Ind.); RealClearPolitics's A.B. Stoddard; Americans for Tax Reform President Grover Norquist; and AOL co-founder Steve Case.

That's 'March for Our Lives' -- not to be confused with 'March for Life':

This weekend, demonstrations will be taking place all over the country to protest gun violence. What the protesters want: Increased gun control and school safety measures. The name is similar: Don't get this confused with the anti-abortion rights annual protest called "March for Life."


Which cities: "So far, according to Facebook events, there are marches being planned for Los Angeles; Chicago; Miami; Las Vegas; Springfield, Missouri; San Francisco; Dallas; New York City; Birmingham, Alabama; West Palm Beach, Florida; Boise, Idaho; Liverpool, England; and more."

When/where in Washington, D.C.: D.C.'s march will begin at noon Saturday at Pennsylvania Avenue NW and 3rd Street NW. 

Street closures & where to avoid: Here's what you need to know about the Washington, D.C., rally, including what streets to avoid:

Performers in D.C.:



Imagine if these high school kids knew what was coming: 



Congress is out -- welp, for now. Stay tuned for more on the drama with the spending bill.

11:30 a.m. EDT: President Trump meets with Defense Secretary James MattisJames Norman MattisShanahan orders new restrictions on sharing of military operations with Congress: report Pentagon reporters left in dark as Iran tensions escalate Trump officials slow-walk president's order to cut off Central American aid: report MORE, Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen NielsenKirstjen Michele NielsenCongressional Hispanic Caucus demands answers on death of migrant children Trump expected to tap Cuccinelli for new immigration post Kobach gave list of demands to White House for 'immigration czar' job: report MORE and Deputy Secretary of State John Sullivan in the Oval Office.

1:50 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence leaves for Atlanta.

4:40 p.m. EDT: President Trump and first lady Melania TrumpMelania TrumpTrump arrives in Japan to kick off 4-day state visit Trump to meet with Prince Harry during UK visit The Hill's 12:30 Report: Trump orders more troops to Mideast amid Iran tensions MORE leave Washington, D.C., for the Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida.

7 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence participates in a Georgia Republican Party dinner.

9:45 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence gets back to Washington, D.C.



1 p.m. EDT: White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders gives the daily press briefing. Livestream:

4:15 p.m. EDT: Vice President Pence speaks about tax reform at an Atlanta event. Livestream:

Sunday morning: Former Trump campaign manager Corey LewandowskiCorey R. LewandowskiMichael Caputo eyes congressional bid Clinton lawyer: Mueller's failure to draw conclusion on obstruction a 'massive dereliction' of duty Mueller's facts vs Trump's spin MORE and Sen. Mark WarnerMark Robert WarnerTrump declassification move unnerves Democrats Hillicon Valley: Assange hit with 17 more charges | Facebook removes record 2.2B fake profiles | Senate passes anti-robocall bill | Senators offer bill to help companies remove Huawei equipment Senators offer bipartisan bill to help US firms remove Huawei equipment from networks MORE (D-Va.) will appear on NBC's "Meet the Press."



Today is National Chips and Dip Day.

Oh, oops. I should have checked my mail today:

Via The Associated Press, the invitations for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding have been sent. Details: "Some 600 people have been invited to the May 19 nuptials at noon at St. George's Chapel at Windsor Castle. All 600 have also been invited to a lunchtime reception given by Queen Elizabeth II at St George's Hall. Dress code: "Uniform, morning coat or lounge suit for men, or day dress with a hat for ladies." Keep in mind: This is a pretty small gathering. Prince William and Kate Middleton had 1,900 guests.

Photo of the invitation -->

And to get your weekend off to a fabulous start, here's a baby elephant trying to snuggle with a woman. I! Want! One!